I’m at a crossroad

I’m at a point in my life where I can go several directions but they all seem equally useful and useless. With my art coming out in the forthcoming book “Grimnoir; Hard Magic” I am now technically a professional artist. Several things have led me to believe that perhaps I should focus some more on my art. For one thing, I have an ‘in.’ I can now say I’m published. That’s quite a feather in my cap. Second; I have found that doing my web comic is immensely joyful for me. Third, I have a total readership of maybe four people with my books. This is not encouraging. Does this mean I’ll give up writing? Heck no. Does this mean I’ll slow down? Heck no. I couldn’t stop or slow down writing as I could breathing. However, it does mean that I’ll use more of my free time working on art, rather than goofing off or playing video games. But, how should I work on my art? Right now despite my advances in web comic production, I’m sort of stuck in a rut. I wish to learn more bout the techniques of digital art. Right now I feel my skills are overly simplistic and when I see what some people can do with the digital medium, I get sort of jealous. I want…no, need to become like that. I need to become versatile and proficient in what I do. In nerd terms, I need to level up. But where do I go with my life? The path I’m on seems to be leading nowhere. I need to find the right path, whatever it may be.

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~ by Minimum Wage Historian on April 12, 2011.

2 Responses to “I’m at a crossroad”

  1. Dude. You don’t NEED to do anything but keep moving.

    What I’m hearing is that you have this idea of a life you want so badly, but the life you have now is nowhere near that. You can see there from here, but you can’t see an angle on getting from here to there. You have this feeling of being lost in a wilderness of mediocrity and are desperate to find the one golden path that leads out.

    I’m here to tell you… you’re on it, and you always have been. You just don’t see that because you want an end-to-end picture. You want to know the road before you travel it.

    You can’t have it that way my friend.

    So you want someone to tell you what to do? Ok. Here’s what you do… You point yourself the general direction in which you want to go, you pick up pieces of this life you want as you go, and enjoy the road. Because I can tell you, for all of us, the destination is just some vision of a nirvana we can never reach. We’ll get someplace that we thought it was, but that ends up being a mere junction from where we simply continue the journey. The road always calls. So we MUST enjoy the walk.

    The more time you spend in one place asking where you should go is that much more time you spent not going there, or someplace, and sampling all the road has to offer.

    Just relax, do what you do, and build on that. Collect the pieces as you go, put one foot in front of the other, and enjoy your walk.

    Or maybe I’m clueless and have it all wrong. *shrug*

    • T-, I don’t know who you are, but I was impressed by what you said. It is all so true. you are very wise. We all get so caught up in the pursuit of success, we forget to enjoy our very short time here.

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